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A straight-identified teen wonders if having an Ft M (female to male transgender) partner means that she is a lesbian.

Figuring out your sexual orientation is complicated for a lot of people, but for someone with a transgender partner, this can raise even more questions.

As a teen with a Ft M (female to male transgender) writes,"I just turned 18 a couple days ago. Here’s the thing, sexual orientation tends to line up with the gender of the person that you are attracted to not with their biological sex.

If a Y sperm fertilizes the X egg, the fetus will be male.Gender, on the other hand, refers to the cultural, and psychological traits typically associated with one sex or the other.Babies are usually assumed to have a male gender at birth if they have a penis, and a female gender if they have a vulva.Gender identity is how someone feels about their gender assignment.Sexual orientation, being lesbian, gay, bisexual or straight refers to who you are attracted to.So if you have an FTM partner, you could definitely identify as straight, even if he has biologically female anatomy, since his gender identity is male. Don't hold back because of the way he was born.That being said, some people with transgender partners identify as queer, or pansexual, since they don’t feel bound by the sex or gender of a partner. You are a straight woman attracted to a masculine man. Love him for the man he is."It can be hard to label your sexual orientation when you have a transgender partner, so if you don't feel like doing so right now, that's okay.Those terms are a little different that bisexual, which refers to people who are attracted to both men and women. Just because he was born with the wrong parts doesn't mean that he is less a man than a man born with all the male parts. But you might also want to think about why having a lesbian identity seems so uncomfortable you.A reader named Harley explains it like this:"I am a 23 yr old FTM, I have a straight girlfriend and I must say you really should not feel like this challenges your sexuality at all. Just like some are born with missing body parts such as a arm, or some are born with an extra thumb, FTM's are just born with the mind of a man and our body doesn't match up with our mind. Doing so might challenge some of the ideas that you have about what it means to be a lesbian.One problem with traditional dating sites, like e Harmony and Match, is that they don't contain appropriate categories for transgender personals, and if they do, often times the labels are still not wholly inclusive.People who are part of the transgender community may become frustrated by sites that try to fit people into boxes of male or female because it can make it difficult for them to meet the type of life partner or friend they are seeking.

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