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Real world brooklyn secret dating

I’ve walked by it a thousand times -- a nondescript "door" in the middle of my apartment building's lobby with no knob and no real reason to be there.

And I know what you're thinking -- it probably goes to the super’s office or a maintenance room. Instead though, it leads into a darkly lit, decades-old swingers club. In a city where bartenders let you smoke after hours (suck it, Bloomberg) and bodegas are used as drug-selling fronts, that was a stupid question.

Great, not only are there sweaty people banging mere feet from where I get my mail, but now I have to worry that La Cosa Nostra is going to come after me for digging into their business. And yes, people are doing it en masse, while others basically stand around and watch. They’d seen someone actually emerge through the door, more than once, but said it’s always the owners, not patrons.

They've seen patrons too, just not in person: a favorite pastime of the overnight weekend doormen is to watch people come and go from the club on our security cameras, one of which is pointed squarely at its front entrance.

Wondering if my building was the only one paying attention on the block, I went next door to gather intel at the cafe on the other side of the sex club and asked to speak to the owner. The dude was surprisingly cool about it though, and told me that he was equally curious about them, but no, his establishment had no such access.

When a good-looking, roughly-my-age-and-definitely-straight guy emerged, I wished our conversation wasn’t going to start with, “Hi, my apartment building is also adjacent to the sex club next door, and we have a secret entrance in our lobby, do you guys have one? He admitted that he’s been trying to figure out a way to get in there and check it out too (other than paying the steep cover and, like, humping strangers), but the one time he mistakenly received their mail and went next door to return it, the front door guy wouldn’t let him in.

Apparently, the door security there is stiffer than the Electric Room at the Dream Downtown.

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On the plus side, he did let me take pictures from their fire escape of just how far back the sprawling building goes.

On the minus side, I’m pretty sure I need to find a new place to get my coffee now.

Still, I wanted to find someone who’d been inside the club as a patron.

And even though I wasn't expecting anyone in my social circle to have partaken, one of my friends offered up a detailed account of a very not-sober night with his stripper date on the other side of those walls.

He said that his stripper friend suggested the field trip after a marathon day-drinking session.

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