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Problem is, none of those attitudes will get you a date with one, much less a relationship. Brains: Contrary to popular opinion, most men aren’t looking for a dumb blonde (or brunette or redhead, what have you).

A ditz is good for a date or two, sure, but only a girl with some smarts will hold a guy’s attention for any real length of time. You don’t have to be a grade-A genius or anything, but you do have to display a modicum of intelligence in some area or other.

Fortunately, you don’t have to be born with brains to be perceived as smart.

Reading the paper or taking an adult-ed class will do just fine. Tenderness: Try, try, try as they might, men just can’t get enough tenderness in their lives.

That’s probably because they can’t find enough of it.

Most women are too busy bossing their men around to notice that the little boy inside that machismo exterior needs a little TLC.

So please, don’t make them beg for it, because they probably won’t.

It threatens their ego too much, and most men would rather just toss you to the curb than let you see them that vulnerable and—gulp! Remember, a man’s heart is a fragile thing (which is why they erect such armor around it).

You have the power to crush their little hearts in the palm of your hand, so tread carefully and don’t abuse that power you wield. Self-Care: Yes, in addition to taking care of them, men also need to know that you take care of yourself.

No matter how much he teases you about it, make no mistake—a woman who cares about how she looks, and goes out of her way to keep herself looking sharp, is a turn-on like no other.

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