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Dating your husband after divorce

If you’re divorced, or have ended a long-term relationship, well-meaning relatives and friends may encourage you to start dating again soon.

But how will you know when you're ready for a new relationship?

“This wildly varies from person to person,” says Judith Sills, Ph D, a Philadelphia-based psychologist and author of Getting Naked Again: Dating, Romance, Sex, and Love When You've Been Divorced, Widowed, Dumped, or Distracted.

“Your marriage has died; you need to grieve that loss,” Barnett says.“To move forward, I had to be whole emotionally, financially, mentally, and spiritually.After I accomplished some set goals, I knew it was time.” Here's what experts say you should consider before dating: Some people are ready to date after 2 months; others may need years. It's important to experience the emotions associated with divorce.Give yourself “a little time to think, a little time to grieve, a little opportunity to find someone else,” Sills says.If you're still thinking about what your ex is doing or whom he's dating, you're too distracted to begin a healthy relationship.“Some people date and even marry to try to prove something to an ex,” says Edward M.Tauber, Ph D, a California-based divorce counselor and co-author of Find the Right One After Divorce.“You wouldn't date somebody who's still tangled up with an ex emotionally. ” If you were in a committed relationship for a long time, the idea of beginning a new romance may seem scary.If you've recently tried other activities that bring you out of your comfort zone, you could be ready to date.“Have you done something that's an affirmation of yourself and your life -- made a new friend, taken up a new sport, gotten a haircut? “You open your heart to new relationships when you're resilient enough to endure the minuses of dating to get the pluses.” Your identity has nothing to do with your dating status.Rather than jumping into a new relationship to avoid being alone, give yourself a chance to explore life on your own terms.

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